Friday, November 11, 2011

Not a Ruined Life

I saw this on a a picture today on Facebook: "I have puppies instead of children.  I'd rather ruin my carpet than my life."

I love animals.  I think dogs are amazing animals.  They provide companionship and love for many people.  I don't currently want one of my own, however, because I don't want the responsibility.  (This may seem odd coming from someone with a good-sized "litter" of children, but it's true.)

The second part of the quote made me sad.  I have four children of my own plus a step-daughter, and my life is far from ruined.  In fact, it has been enriched beyond my wildest dreams.  Although some of my own dreams have been postponed and maybe even cancelled because of my kids, the trade-off has been in my favour.  Even when I thought everything I had worked so hard for was going to all but go up in smoke because I got pregnant in university, it worked out to my advantage.  I was able to take courses I wouldn't have been able to fit in otherwise, giving me a French course that greatly improved my language skills (though they still have a long way to go), as well as an additional degree in Kinesiology that has opened up another world of possibilities.  I'm sure there are many blessings that I don't even know about, and I haven't even included the obvious one - my beautiful son who brings me joy every day.

I realize that having kids is not for everyone, just as having puppies is not for everyone, but know this: my life is different, not ruined.  It is a life of struggle as I try to raise kids to make the right choices, to make their mistakes and learn from them, to become a person they are proud to be.  I give up things so that my kids have more opportunities.  I hope and pray that they will learn to appreciate each other rather than criticize each other.  I hurt when they hurt.  I also rejoice when they succeed.  I experience great joy when they sacrifice something for another person.  I smile when they triumph over something that has been a hardship for them.  And I cherish every hug, every kiss, every "I love you" that leaves their lips.

Definitely not a ruined life.